To Dethrone Kings

Today I began preparing for 21 days of prayer and fasting. About two weeks ago I was starting to feel sorry because of the weight I had gained over the last year and my frustrated attempts at losing it. I finally had a moment where it hit me that I simply was not strong enough to do this on my own and I began to reach out to God. He very gently reminded me of a few issues and the inward-out-transformation process began.

A while back I had come to a realization that I was actually addicted to food. I don't have the time or energy or even the memory to explain how or why I came to that conclusion but every logical thought I have in this matter seems to confirm it. I turn to food when I am happy. I turn to food when I am sad. I turn to food when I am bored. The only times I don't turn to food are times when I am unable, and then turn to food as soon as I can. I use food as a coping mechanism. I use food to celebrate. You name it, I ate it.

God reminded me of this fact and around the same time I not-so-coincidentally saw this sermon posted online. I listened intently as Pastor Chris described my dilemma and the mixed emotions of addictive behavior. In the sermon he carefully explains that addiction stems from idolatry, and that in it's essence idolatry is simply granting things other than God a higher place in your heart. The allegory used is that you are putting something other than God on the throne of your heart. God is still there, but He's not the King. The simple solution is to dethrone those other kings, and I will do that by fasting and prayer.

I started preparing yesterday. I've been on raw fruits and vegetables and today is my first day without caffeine. Tomorrow I start to fast.

So far things have been good. I had a really great day yesterday with some powerful prayer during lunch. Today I have felt quite sluggish and that caffeine-headache is coming on slowly. Hopefully by the weekend I will feel normal physically, but pumped spiritually.