Stoned

My life has been seriously ridiculous lately. There have been so many unexpected things that have pulled me in new directions. I wish I could just spill my beans on here and let you all in on my secrets. Unfortunately I can't.

Over the past few months I have been on a great journey. I really don't want to sound smug, but it really has been a crazy adventure with God. I have been challenged, stretched, angered, plundered, saddened, joyful, excited, and scared. Sometimes going through all of those emotions in one day.

There are a few reasons as to why it has been such an unpredictable ride, and one I can share is the pursuit Holiness. Man I have just had strong conviction lately. I can't seem to get it off me sometimes. Conviction is like that neighborhood dog you don't like, but you don't hate either. You know. It's the dog that wanders up and is like "hey I'm here" and you're like "ugh man you again, dang, what am I going to do with you?" Yeah so conviction sucks but it is awesome at the same time.

Let me tell you a story.

So the other day I had messed up pretty bad. I don't typically have any road rage issues. Sometimes I get a little angry when people ride my bumper, but rarely enough to even look twice. Well a couple of days ago a dude (in a maroon Buick fyi) pissed me off so bad I rolled my window down and screamed "hey, f*** you!". Yeah he heard me too, no direct response he just changed lanes and got out of there. My heart was racing I was so mad. Well clearly you realize that was a mistake. I definitely felt convicted about it in like...I don't know...5 nanoseconds. Anyway it was a dumb move and that guy probably got cursed at like 6 other times before he got to his destination, just judging by the way he was driving.

But enough about him.

So yeah that event kinda soured my day. After that I had a few other things wagging their tail of conviction at me. I knew things in my Spirit were out of sync with God. I needed to get some quiet time in that night to just talk to God and let Him know how sorry I was. You see there's this thing about Holiness, you can't stop pursuing it. You lose sight of Holiness and its like a snowball after that. You stop thinking about your actions, and you just start acting. That's not right. I knew I had to straighten stuff out. And I did, praises.

Anyways...I don't want to preach today.

I don't intend for this to be a mini-lesson. I just want to share where I'm at. God is working on me in a "burning stuff to the surface and scraping it off" kind of way. Its cool because I can see tangible results, but it can be painful too. God is truly great and He knows what's up...but sometimes I want a break you know. Like God can you give me five freakin' minutes. Then I remember how I would much rather go through it now while its easier than go through it after years of being a hopeless sinner. God's way is always better. Yeah I'm ranting now I know. Well ok then, have a scripture and a smile.

:)

"Welcome to the living Stone, the source of life. The workmen took one look and threw it out; God set it in the place of honor. Present yourselves as building stones for the construction of a sanctuary vibrant with life, in which you'll serve as holy priests offering Christ-approved lives up to God." ~ 1 Peter 2:4-8ish

Holiness Kinda

I've always considered myself to be a pretty liberal Christian. When I say liberal I mean the opposite of legalistic. My pastor, Mike, explains it like this: A legalistic Christian sets up and enforces rules and cultural standards that protect us from sin, whereas liberal Christian forsakes all of that for more of a try not to sin but don't get too worried about it approach. Both of these ways of thinking (I refuse to call them theologies) translate to people differently.

Some people seem to do really well under a legalistic approach to God. You know some people just need those tangible boundaries and a clear idea of when they've crossed the line. Others, like me, seem to feel more comfortable and open to God with a more liberal approach. Of course both have there pros and cons, and I'm not here trying to sell anyone on one way or the other.

What I'm getting at is I've realized some problems with my liberal approach. Mike says that the liberal way of thinking often gets confused as a license to sin. What he's saying is that people eventually will train themselves to think that sin is alright because we've got grace and mercy. As long as God forgives us we mights as well do whatever the heck we want right? Well clearly that is a problem.

Finally here is an even more quirky part of the whole no boundaries kind of thinking. The more mature I get the more liberal I get. And I mean mature like closer to God. The closer to God I get the more I realize that sin IS covered and that His Grace and His Mercy is much much bigger than my faults. Even more so I find I have more grace and mercy and forgiveness for others. So am I reinforcing a loophole in my beliefs, and in turn in instilling these loopholes in others?

I had a great conversation last night and we examined this exact problem. Ultimately we agreed that a real-deal hold nothing back relationship with God is the key. Taking our American Christian culture as an example, what are we left with if we strip away the rules, the boundaries, and the cultural standards we get from legalism? Now what if we also get rid of the license to sin we get from liberalism? What is left to help us deal with sin? By removing these methods of sin, or methods that prohibit sin, we are left with our relationship with Christ. If we are Christ-centric then following rules won't matter, just like that license to sin becomes a pile of bull-malarkey. If we are striving for the heart of God then we land on Jesus, and Him alone. That's all that really matters. See the scripture below, its spelled out pretty plainly.

So yeah I feel like I'm pretty liberal. This post started because I'm feeling very convicted in some areas, which as a liberal Christian is an odd feeling. But I do feel God drawing me to Holiness and frankly it sucks giving up things that please me. But rather than focusing on my past mistakes, and rather than agonizing over the sacrifices yet to be made, I chose to follow Christ. I will let him be the example, and critic, and savior.

To be mature is to be basic. Christ! No more, no less. That's what I'm working so hard at day after day, year after year, doing my best with the energy God so generously gives me.
~ Colossians 1:28-29

** The term liberal in this post has absolutely nothing to do with my political beliefs ;-) **